I’m one of those girls. I dated and eventually married an avid gamer. And, yes, he played more when we were dating than now and that’s because we grew up and just don’t have as much free time. But when we were dating, in college, that Xbox was on overdrive. And I loved it.

My husband kills it when he plays Call of Duty. It is definitely his game of choice. I bought him his Xbox 360, new controllers when his got too old, controller accessories, and more to foster this hobby. He has an Alienware computer that he plays Day of Defeat which for those too young to remember is a game that was derived from Half Life in 2003 before becoming what it is today.

Gaming takes talent. For those that disagree I challenge them to play any sort of console-based game against a gamer. Unfortunately, I didn’t receive the gaming gene and when someone hands me an Xbox controller I become the player that can’t figure out how to look around and shoot at the same time. I constantly complain that I want to learn to play and my husband just laughs. He says I have other wonderful qualities. One day I will be able to play. I will beat him at Halo or Call of Duty. And it will be awesome.

I would say I am an anomaly when it comes to this. There are extensive posts, blogs, and memes that funnel through our inboxes that convey girls’ disdain for their partner’s interest in gaming. Luckily for my husband I grew up watching and loving gaming. I started watching my brother play games like Halo, GoldenEye 007, Call of Duty and other popular games at a young age and found it fascinating. I loved hearing the narration, following the story line, and truly seeing the talent it took to be an excellent gamer.

I come here to ask why? Why do girls have an issue with their partner being a gamer? While I don’t condone gaming addiction, of course, that would be ridiculous, I do believe that women who date or marry gamers should not expect that to completely change when the relationship continues or they inevitably get married. Now, this may infuriate some, but to me it’s simple. Don’t change them just because you think you can. My husband has never expected me to change or to stop enjoying a pastime simply because we are married now. Girls have internet based hobbies too such as Pinterest, Instagram, Facebook, and other social media sites. Why do we feel that this is any different? Gaming is a hobby and as long as it is enjoyed responsibly then I say have at it!

One Response

  1. A J

    I never wanted to change my husband, and I know that this has helped us in our relationship. I also decided to take interest in his pastimes and noticed that he in turn did the same. Now, I know just as much about comic books and superheroes as I do click flicks….weird, but it works for me. Thanks for giving voice to the ladies who like nerds!